Seeds of Success

Is it just me or is December flying by?

A few entries ago I promised to share a few of my 2006 goals and give a progress report. I’ve chosen five goals (from my list of 25) to share with you.

Why five? Why these five?

I’ve chosen these five goals because they represent the different status options of any goal you may add to your own list.

Goal 1: Schedule 1-2 speaking gigs per month
Status: Not attained by choice.

I was doing well with this goal through spring ‘06. But then some changes within my family caused me to reevaluate this goal. I made a choice to no longer actively pursue speaking engagements for the time being. I will, however, still consider opportunities that present themselves but I’m not looking for them.

Over a period of years, weeks and sometimes even days, your priorities can change. Be willing to make a conscious decision to adapt your goals to reflect those changes. I haven’t given up on the goal to motivate and inspire people through my talks, but it can’t be a top priority for me at this time. That’s okay. It’s okay if one of your goals has to take a back seat too.

Goal 2: Create a home study course based on the stories in my book Glow
Status: Deleted from list

This project was one that I’d been bouncing around in my head since I published Glow in 2003. But after seeing it written down, I realized that it wasn’t something I really wanted to do. The stories in Glow speak for themselves… to take them apart and instruct someone on how to apply them seemed unnecessary.

There are some goals you may decide you no longer want to achieve. You may have a reason or you may just lose interest. That’s okay. Delete the item from your list if you are no longer drawn to it.

Goal 3: Organize my computer files
Status: Not done, not started, but still wanted

My computer files are a mess. I know where things are (for the most part), but I would like my files to be better organized. I’d like to delete duplicates of both written and audio files. Sometimes I can’t find the most recent version of something so I end up working on older versions again and again.

Some goals just haven’t made it to the top of your priority list. If the goal is a big one or seems overwhelming, it can be easy to push it to the bottom of your list. My advice for these goals you haven’t even started is to build time into your schedule to create a task list. Break the goal down into as many small tasks as you can. And then start working on them in 5 or 10 minute increments.

Rather than dropping this goal from my list, I’ll add it to my 2007 goal list.

Goal 4: Do a top-to-bottom whole house cleaning
Status: In progress

I’ve written several entries on this goal. Let’s just say I’m plugging (or polishing) away at it. I haven’t given up on it. I’m still working on it. It will get done. Whether I finish before the clock strikes midnight on Dec. 31st, I can’t say. But I’ll keep working until this goal is finished.

Some goals take time. They take effort. They take continued focus. If it’s important to you, keep at it. Every little bit you do makes a difference.

Goal 5: Spend time each month with friends
Status: Done

This goal was a challenge at times. Finding time to spend with friends means working around the schedules of two or more busy people. It did take advance planning. It did take compromising. But what a great time I had staying involved in the ups and downs of my friends’ lives. This goal will definitely stay on my list for 2007!

When you achieve a goal it’s important to recognize that you’ve achieved it. Celebrate! Consciously recognize the effort and choices you made to make it happen. Thank the people who’ve helped you along the way. Allow your success at this goal to spur you on to another goal on your list.

So that’s my Goals 2006 update.

Have you taken a look at your own goals? Are you thinking about your goals for 2007?

Last week I shared one of my goals for 2006… to do a top-to-bottom house cleaning.

I’ll admit that I’m still feeling pretty overwhelmed with all that I have left to do.

I created a checklist of things I needed to do to finish cleaning the den. It had 5 tasks on it.

Den cleaning
* Clean off desk top
* Dust pictures on walls
* Wash ceiling light
* Wash sliding doors
* Clear rest of stuff off the floor

Yesterday I made a commitment to clean off the desk top. This was the most obvious mess. When I finished that task, I treated myself to a tangerine, a handful of Wheat Thin crackers and a glass of apple cider. Yum!

I briefly debated whether I wanted to do some PC work or watch some television. Then a third option presented itself. I could complete another task in the den. So I washed the sliding glass doors (brrr… it was cold outside!). I pulled out my list and placed a heavy black line through that task.

Hmmm… did I want to keep going? I wiggled for a moment like a child trying to decide if he needs to use the toilet. I decided that yes, I did need to use the bathroom–and yes, I did want to keep cleaning.

Next I washed the crystal chandelier. You should see the beautiful pattern the light shines on the ceiling now that dust isn’t covering the glass panels!

I crossed that item off my list. Yes! Only two more tasks to go.

You guessed it, being so close to completing this goal, I stayed at it until the job was done. What a feeling a satisfaction I felt when I crossed off those final two tasks as well as the task title.

You’ve probably heard that goal setting advice before… break down bigger jobs into smaller tasks. If you don’t typically do this, give it a try. You really feel like you’ve accomplished something when you see check marks beside or lines through each task that you’ve finished. It also helps you use little blocks of time more effectively.

Yesterday I had a large block of time available. That isn’t the case most days.

But the principle of breaking big jobs into smaller tasks really works when you don’t have much time.

In fact, one of my kitchen cleaning tasks is to clean the four drawers in my kitchen. The total project will probably take about 30 minutes. They’re pretty well organized and just need to be wiped down and the contents straightened. Finding 30 minutes to do this may seem impossible on most days. But when I consider that I can do one drawer at a time, taking about 5-8 minutes each… I think I can do that.

In fact, I have a few minutes now, before I drive my son to school. So rather than waste time playing Freecell solitaire on the computer, I’ll work on my goals.

What are you doing today?

This past January I created a list of goals for 2006. For the past few weeks I’ve been very aware that one of my major personal goals is still a long way from being completed. The goal? Do a top-to-bottom, whole-house cleaning.

I was surprised to see that I’ve actually completed 50 percent of that goal. I’ve cleaned 4 rooms and have 4 left to clean. Unfortunately, two of the rooms were cleaned early in the year and no longer look as pristine as they did, but that doesn’t matter. What matters is that I did the work and for a (short) time, enjoyed the results.

Now here it is… December 1st. I have one crazy, buzy, over-loaded month to clean half of my house. Can I do it? Should I even bother to try?

Some goals may seem insurmountable, but we can take steps to accomplish them bit by bit. Just this morning, before starting this entry, I did spend a few minutes picking up some books I needed to reshelf. That task of the goal to clean our den is done. In a few minutes I’ll go back and do another task. I’m confident that I can have that room cleaned before I need to take a nap this afternoon.

How can I be so confident? Because I’m determined to get this done. This was my top goal for 2006. I’ve been thinking about it for the entire year. And it’s crunch time. Now I need to make it happen.

Did you create your own written list of goals? If you did, pull it out and check to see how you’re doing. You still have time to get started on some of your 2006 goals and perhaps even check some of them off.

In the coming days I’ll share a few more of my 2006 goals. I’ll also let you know how I’ve done with them. Until then, I have a den to clean!

Update: 12/1/06 at 5 p.m.

Just wanted to let you know that I made terrific progress on cleaning my den this afternoon. I’ll admit that when I walked in to the room I felt overwhelmed (and suddenly ready to take that nap).

I took a deep breath, put on some Christmas tunes, and pulled out my dust rags. In just an hour I was able to

• dust all the furniture
• Swifter the walls and ceilings (no more cobwebs)
• dust the picture frames
• dust the stereo equipment and shelf it sits on
• sweep the floor (beneath the furniture, too!)
• and put non-den items back where they belong

I’ll confess the work isn’t done yet. But I’m so much closer to my goal of cleaning that room from top to bottom.

What better use could I have made for that one hour before bedtime? Honestly, I don’t think there was one.

How have you used your time today?

I’m trying to get in the holiday spirit, but for the past week or so I’ve been harboring ill will for a blond-haired woman I’ve never talked to and probably never will.

I don’t think she lives in my neighborhood, but she might. The incident I’m going to tell you about happened on the street behind mine.

Here’s the deal…

I was taking my daily dreaded walk. It was a sunny but cold day. I was on the home stretch.

I’d just passed the house where Griffen, a beautiful bouncy barky dog lived. He greeted me as usual, running along the lawn but not crossing onto the sidewalk.

I called out a greeting to him, then sauntered past. My thoughts were focused on home just like the trail horse that knows the barn is just a short distance away.

As I passed a driveway loaded with minivans and SUVs, a big brown fluffy dog came running toward me. I turned to greet him as I had Griffen, but he didn’t look like he wanted to be friends. The blond woman called to him, but he kept coming toward me. I turned my back and raised my arms.

The woman called again–she was holding a matching dog by the collar–but he ignored her.

The dog jumped at my back and I stumbled. I recovered without falling and braced myself for another attack. But the dog had had his fun and he was happily rejoining his mommy and twin.

Now here’s what gets me mad.

I turned to accept her apologies and assure her I was all right, but she never even looked at me. She never asked me if I was okay. All she did was scold her “bad puppy” in that annoying baby voice that people use to reprimand their pets.

I shook my head and continued my walk home. When I hung up my coat I noticed big paw prints on the back of it.

I know, I need to get over it. I wasn’t hurt. I don’t suddenly have this irrational fear of big dogs…

And after all… tis the season to be jolly… fa la la la la…

So, in the spirit of giving, I offer a special holiday wish for this woman… May she receive many unexpected (open-mouthed) doggy breath kisses, chocolate-covered shoes, and liquid surprises under her Christmas tree.

I’ve never attended a high school reunion. To be honest, I doubt I will ever attend a reunion. Without boring you with my reasons (which are probably reasons you’ve expressed yourself or heard from former classmates who won’t attend reunions) let’s just say that “it ain’t gonna happen.” (see how much I learned in English class?)

But this past Saturday night my high school class held its 25th reunion. I have kept myself on the e-mail mailing list because I’d hate to have my name appear on the “do-you-know-how-to-find-??” list.

I’m not sure if it’s a sign, but most of the people I would want to see at a reunion actually have their names on that list! Maybe they’re the smart ones.

Anyway… although I didn’t attend the reunion but did receive a link to photos of the event.

Curiousity got the best of me and I took a peak.

I might just as well have been looking at pictures from my husband’s class reunion (or your class reunion for that matter). I didn’t recognize hardly anyone. What added to the challenge is that I didn’t know if the man or woman/man or man/woman or woman were my classmate? Perhaps both? I was clueless.

I did recognize our fearless class president. Mostly because she’s so short and her hair so dark.

There was one man who appeared in several photos. His demeanor suggested that he was probably popular in school, but nothing about him was familiar to me. I’m guessing he was a local celebrity (perhaps a weatherman) who married a classmate.

I can’t say the pictures made me wish I had attended the reunion, but I will say that I wouldn’t have worn black if I had.

Why do women always wear black to these things? Sure it may make you look thinner, but in the photograph of the entire class, they were pale faces bobbing on a sea of black clothing.

I can’t help but wonder how many… here’s the cynic in me… stood with smiles plastered on their faces wishing they were home eating Ben & Jerry’s ice cream and watching TV Land reruns. But that might be just me.

My husband loves going to his reunions. He hasn’t missed one. Although I attended his first reunion, now I encourage him to go without me. Reasons to avoid class reunions, I’ve discovered, span states, schools and years.

Maybe I’ll save the link to my class reunion photos. Maybe someday I’ll pull out my dusty yearbook and try to makes some matches. Or maybe I’ll just wash my hair.

Saturday was an amazing day!

The morning was spent running errands with my husband, the noontime hour was spent sitting on my front steps reading a good novel, and the afternoon was spent having tea with friends.

Ahhhh…

Wait a minute… I don’t drink tea. I don’t like tea. What was I doing spending a Saturday afternoon having tea??

Fortunately for me, Milliken House in Saco, Maine, offered hot mulled cider as an alternative to many different flavors of tea and coffee.

More importantly to me, though, was their selection of fine desserts. Yum yum! Although the COW (cake of the week) was a tempting Boston Cream Pie, I opted for four layers of chocolate cake and a thick, rich icing. This delectable treat was called The Tower of Babel. Double yum!

Anyway… while the cider and chocolate cake were a sight for deprived taste buds… the highlight of the afternoon was sitting quietly (and sometimes not so quietly) with five wonderful women. (I have to be careful not to call them girls!)

It was so nice to unload many of my current stresses. It was nice to hear words of comfort and support. It was nice to have them laugh at (and with) me when I’m taking life too seriously. These friends helped me find perspective again.

In an historic old Victorian home, in an informal library setting, I stepped away from my day-to-day life for a couple of hours and just enjoyed the company of my friends.

For the rest of Saturday and all day Sunday I replayed conversations and stories we shared.

I imagined Lynda’s run-in with her neighbor and the handsome Cape Elizabeth policeman who came to her rescue. I imagined Linda driving around in circles so that she could pass by another (or perhaps the same) handsome Cape Elizabeth police officer. We’ve decided that C.E. needs to create a calendar for us!

The stress level in my life has increased hugely in recent weeks. With the approaching holidays I don’t see an end in sight for the demands on my time, energy and focus. But Saturday provided a brief respite for me.

And from what the other women said, the time away was needed by all.

When you feel stress building up, if your shoulders are feeling tight or if you head is starting to ache… escape for an hour or two with a friend. You may think you can’t take the time away from whatever it is that’s consuming your time, but I promise you you’ll feel better if you do. You’ll feel reconnected with your friend and you’ll feel reconnected with yourself.

Let me know how it goes!

Today’s message on my “Applause” perpetual calendar reads:

Stay current, not canned ~ Florence Littauer

This quote is directly related to the profession of public speaking, but I think it works pretty well as a personal philosophy, too.

For speakers, the quotation means to keep your presentations fresh. Don’t rely on familiar but outdated statistics, news events, etc. Keep your eye out for current events that illustrate your point. Pay attention to recent studies that may support or disprove your key points.

And if studies suggest your main point is wrong… be willing to change your presentation to reflect this new information. Or if you disagree with the new data, be ready to defend your position in another way.

As a personal philosophy, this bit of wisdom is equally powerful and important.

How often do you fall into the trap of accepting your current viewpoints as valid? How many times do you question what your beliefs are? How willing are you to take in new information, mull it over, and see if it changes your position on the topic?

When you stay current with your values, beliefs, and decisions it means that you’ve taken time to evaluate and adjust when needed. When you treat life as a canned performance, you just keep practicing the same attitudes and behaviors no matter what your current circumstances suggest would be a better approach.

As an example… I’ve been watching the Larry Winget show “Big Spender.” It’s amazing how many people won’t curtail their spending when they suddenly experience a financial setback. They are taking a “canned” approach to spending. They are using what was established in the past as the rule for the present and future. They don’t stop to consider whether their canned approach still works.

So your challenge for today is to look at the things you are doing. Are you thinking and behaving in a way that is fresh and up-to-date or are you treating every action and thought just as you did in the past?

Let me know what you discover about yourself.

One of the blogs I read regularly is called “Everyday Courage.”

Saturday’s entry about the physical manifestations of fear really struck a chord with me. Read Amanda Murphy’s epiphany…

Not because I’ve noticed a pattern in my own behaviors (but I’m sure some of my close friends have!) but because I’ve seen similar patterns in friends and family members. I know which friends will cancel out of plans and the excuses they’ll give.

So… did it ring any bells for you? Did it strike a chord?

I’ll be thinking about this post and how I respond to fear in the coming days. I hope you’ll take time to do the same thing.

Amanda wrote that she pushed herself through the pain and experienced success… we can do the same thing!

Election Day 2006 is behind us. Phew!

Whether you are happy or disheartened by the results, the choices have been made. The people have spoken. Now we all get to play the “wait and see” game.

Will the changes in government leadership make a difference? Will the leaders and policies we kept in place carry out their promises? Or will life continue on as if election day didn’t even happen?

Quite often it takes time for changes in leadership to have an impact on the results we see on a daily basis. So I have to remind myself to be patient. Rome wasn’t built in a day and all that jazz.

I may not have control over the changes and promises made by our recently elected officials come to fruition, but I do have control over my own decisions and actions.

I can make sure that the promises I make to myself and others are well thought out. I can make sure that the actions required to fulfill each promise are within my power and authority. I can make sure that I have the passion and determination to fight through the obstacles to achieve the promised results.

Each day you elect to continue or change your attitudes and behaviors that have made you who you are today.

If you want to bring about changes in your life, you can. You can cast a new ballot every day (every minute!). But then it’s up to you to act on that choice.

Are you going to remember and keep the promises you’ve made to yourself and others or are you going to pull up the roadside signs, cancel the expensive TV and radio ads, and pretend those promises weren’t made or no longer matter?

You may think people won’t notice, but they will. And the next time you ask for their vote of confidence, you just may not get it.

So remember and work hard to keep your promises. It’s important. Your life happiness depends on it.

Growing up I never learned the importance of voting. My parents were registered “independents” but I don’t know if they ever actually registered to vote or if they wanted to lay claim to being open-minded and independent thinking. One thing I’m fairly certain of, though, is that neither one of them ever voted.

After every election they would poo-pah about the results. As an adult I had no tolerance for their complaints though. If they didn’t vote, I said, they had no right to complain about the outcome. It didn’t take many election days before we no longer talked about election results.

Today I went to vote. I saw a woman with her young son. I saw him clutching her leg as she stood behind the voting booth curtain. When they stepped out, the boy started running. Three steps forward and down he went.

His mom helped him regain his feet and they headed for the ballot box. I watched as her hands helped him feed her ballot into the counting machine. So sweet.

It brought back memories of when my children were small. I’d bring both of them with me to the voting booth. I remember one year my daughter wanted to make the mark on my ballot.

I was tempted to let her. But then I realized that it was my vote. It was up to me to mark it. I explained to her as best I could that voting is too important and too special to let someone else do it for you. I don’t know if she understood but she accepted it.

Today she went to vote for the first time.

This is so exciting to me. Scary, too.

You see my daughter has different opinions and different ideals than I do. I don’t know how she’s going to vote, but chances are good her vote will cancel out my vote.

Hmmm…

But you know what? I believe in the process. I trust that together, the people in our communities can make the best decisions for all of us. I believe that in the privacy of the voting booth each of us can express our true opinions.

Today you have an opportunity to make changes in your government.

Election Day is a special day to decide on community issues and government leadership.

But every day you have the opportunity to cast your ballot for what you want in life. Your vote counts… but only if you cast it.

Please vote today and everyday!